Pulling the Trooth Read online

“All the good ones are taken, huh?” Maxine said as Summer made a face. “Well, on to the next contestant. Thanks again.”

  “You’re welcome. See you tomorrow.” The man seemed relieved they were leaving.

  Summer put her arm around Maxine’s as they moved off. “This is killing me.” The pair walked away from the other people sitting in dental in chairs- there were ten in all. “So dentists bring their own ringer patients to competitions? These people are nuts.”

  “Maybe there’s money involved. Or notoriety.” Maxine shrugged. “I mean, if you can help yourself win a competition and can afford to bring your own playing field, why not?” She pointed at the other people. “You want to see if there’s someone more interesting than the Bill ‘No Bleeding’ Volker, or do you want to talk to the dentists?”

  “Let’s hit up the dentists.” Summer adjusted her press pass- she had extended her lanyard as far as it would go so that it hung just below the cleavage. “Anyone who can put up a patient for a competition can’t be doing too badly, right?”

  “Right.”

  The pair walked toward the door to the side of the large stage. There was a large man standing in front of the door. Under his crossed muscular arms, one could just make out the word ‘security’ in large yellow letters. His stern look ensured people knew he took his job seriously.

  “Can I help you, ladies?” The man said in a deep voice.

  “Hello,” Maxine said- the large black man was definitely her taste in men. “We are here from the Tucson Herald Opinion, doing a piece on the convention.”

  “Why?” The man asked, genuinely perplexed.

  “That’s the same thing I said to our editor,” Summer said. She swiveled around and stood beside the man, facing Maxine. “Yeah, why?”

  “Because it pays the bills.” Maxine said matter-of-factly. “A girl’s got to eat.”

  Summer nudged the man with her shoulder- hers reached him at his armpit, “Well, there you have it. A gal’s got to eat.”

  The man’s terse tone returned. “So what can I do for you, ladies?”

  “There’s two answers to that question,” Summer moved back beside her partner. “Mine is to let us in to do a quick interview or two.”

  “And the other?”

  Now Summer nudged Maxine with her shoulder. “What can he do for you, Maxie? Inquiring minds want to know.”

  Maxine shot her friend a look. “Let me in to take photos of the interviewees, of course.”

  “I’m not sure I am allowed to do that.” The man said.

  “Listen...” Maxine’s voice trailed off.

  “Stephan.” The man answered.

  “Listen Stephan,” Maxine continued. “We’re just trying to do a cover story on the convention, nothing scandalous.” Her eyebrows went up. “There isn’t anything scandalous going on, is there?”

  “Not during the day time.” The man admitted. “The bar gets kind of rowdy at night though.”

  “Well then,” Summer said. “How about we go in for a few minutes, take some photos and talk to the dentists real quick? Then we’ll be on our way.”

  Maxine held up her press pass. “We’ll behave, we promise.”

  “At least until night.” Summer gave a wink. “Promise.”

  “You only have fifteen minutes until the competition starts.” Stephan opened the door. “I hope you two are fast workers.”

  “Maxine is,” Summer said as she walked through the door. “From what I’ve heard.”

  Maxine’s already dark complexion got even darker as she blushed. “She’s such a kidder.” She moved into the doorway.

  “Mmm-hmmm.” Stephan said as he reached behind her to grasp the door handle, his face close to hers. “I’d love to tell you the real story about conventions if you’re around later this evening.”

  “Oh?” Maxine said. The man was very handsome. “Later this evening?”

  “Around seven o’clock. At the bar?”

  “Oh, I don’t know.”

  “You can bring your friend, if it makes you more comfortable,” Stephan said. He smiled wide. “It’s a wide open, nice and public bar that serves food too. I promise.”

  Maxine smiled. “Okay, I’ll let you know by lunch time. Are you going to be here?”

  Stephan shook his head. “No; we move around. But just go to any security guard and tell them you have a code ten-eighteen for Rover Three.”

  “What?”

  “I’m Rover Three.” He pointed at the big yellow ‘Security’ across his chest. “And a ten eighteen is the code for requesting a dinner break.” He tapped his ear- there was an earpiece in it. “And they’ll pass the message over the network.” He smiled again. “You better catch up to your friend. Just let me know so I know to hold off for my dinner break. I can give you the inside scoop on the convention.”

  “Okay, I’ll let you know.” Maxine smiled then entered the room. She looked around the large area- there were tables and chairs set up for the dentists to sit at. Over half of them were older men and women, with the rest in their mid-thirties. Several were leaning back in their chairs, relaxing. One fit and good looking man had his feet on the table, chair up on its back two legs. This was the dentist Summer was talking to, so Maxine headed that way.

  “And that’s when I learned I was lactose intolerant,” the Dentist said.

  “How interesting,” Summer said. She looked at her friend and crossed her eyes. “Ahh, my associate Maxine is here. Can you snap a photo or two?”

  The Dentist brought his arms up and laced his fingers behind his head. “Fire away, Max. I don’t have a bad side.” He smiled wide, showing off perfect white teeth.

  “Oh, I can see that,” Maxine said. She took a step back and took several photos. “So...” She gestured at the dentist. “You and Mister Volker looking at winning this competition?”

  “Who?”

  “Ahh, this is Scott Anderson.” Summer pointed at a dentist two tables away. He was only a little older, but larger, and definitely less good looking that Scott. “You mean Terrance Brushwood. He’s with Volker.”

  Scott brought his hand from behind his head and offered it to Maxie. “Scott Anderson, D.D.S. I’m sure it’s a pleasure.”

  “It is?” Maxine said as she shook his hand. “Golly, I’ve never met a real dentist before,” she said in a child’s voice.

  “Damn straight.” The man returned his hand behind his head. “Not one like me, you haven’t.”

  “You don’t say,” Maxine said with mock skepticism. “Is that because you’re a total...”

  “Doctor Anderson, here,” Summer interrupted quickly. “Is a very successful doctor from Nevada.”

  “My dental network covers from Pahrump to Needles to Kingman.” Scott proudly said.

  “That doesn’t sound like a lot of people.” Maxine remarked.

  “That area, since you don’t know, also includes all of Las Vegas, Fort Mohave, and Lake Havasu and all the little towns in between. That’s almost three million people. That’s a lot of braces, extractions, and fillings in the entire Tri-State area,” Scott said matter-of-factly.

  “Huh.” Maxine said, not sounding convinced. “So you’re part of that network?”

  “Honey, I’m the owner of that network; Sammy’s Smiles.”

  “Honey?” Maxine seethed. “You know...”

  “So Sammy doesn’t own his own teeth repair shop?” Summer said, cutting her off.

  “Teeth repair shop?” Scott took his feet off the table, letting the chair clatter loudly back to all four legs. “Sammy’s Smiles, since you don’t seem to know, is it when it comes to franchise dentistry.” He made little quote signs with is fingers when he said ‘it’. “I have one hundred thirty-six offices spread across Nevada, Arizona, and Southern California, with five more offices opening next year.” He spread his arms out wide. “If you see a dentist in the Tri-State, Lake Havasu, Las Vegas area, it’s probably a Sammy’s Smiles dentist. And I have plans to get bigger. Much bigger.” />
  “Wow; I have to admit, that is impressive.” Maxine said.

  “Damn right it is,” Scott’s smile returned.

  “So, why isn’t it ‘Scott’s Teeth’?” Maxine asked. “Seems only fair, I think, with you running the whole show.”

  “Right?” Scott leaned toward her. “That’s what I wanted, but after some market research and test audiences, ‘Sammy’s Smiles’ sounded more family friendly. It really scored well with teen and pre-teen groups.”

  “That kind of sucks.” Maxine observed.

  “Completely!”

  “You should have held out. Stuck to your guns about it.”

  “Right? That’s what I...”

  “So anyway,” Summer interrupted, “Scott was telling me how these conventions have these competitions that really make or break a practice.” She moved behind him and nodded slowly at Maxine. “That’s why some less capable dentists try and make it easier on themselves by bringing their own patients.”

  “Oh,” Maxine said. “Did you bring one from one of your hundred thirty offices?”

  “One hundred thirty-six offices.” Scott said testily. “No, of course not; I don’t have to stoop to that kind of thing.”

  “So who are you working on?” Maxine asked. She snapped another picture of him.

  “I am working on some homeless guy my advance team found yesterday.”

  “That’s really nice of you, helping out homeless folks with free dental work.” Maxine smiled at him, thinking the man was apparently just not good at first impressions.

  “Sure, sure.” Scott waved a hand dismissively. “Good press and all that. Besides with his poor diet and drug habit, his teeth are practically falling out on their own. Plus I don’t even have to pay him anything. A sandwich and a box of milk afterwards and he’s on his way.”

  “Oh.” Maxine said, deciding that apparently his first impression was actually accurate after all. “Aren’t you just a cup overflowing with human kindness. Or a milk box even.”

  “Damn right I am.” Scott said. He put his hands on the table. “So you want to hear about my childhood? I was a great looking kid, too.”

  Summer moved around to the other side of the man. “To be fair to the other dentists, we need to talk to them as well. We can’t show favorites.”

  “That makes sense; you can’t have the less fortunate dentists actually realize they are.”

  “Ready Maxie?”

  “Almost.” She looked down at her camera and deleted all of Scott’s images. “There we go.”

  “Got them saved for later?” Scott winked at Maxine.

  “Damn right I do.” Maxine looked at Summer. “Ready, Summer?”

  Scott stifled a chuckle. “Summer? So you’re named Summer Schauers?”

  Summer frowned at the man. “At least I could name my business after myself if I wanted to, Scott.”

  “Oh, hey, listen,” Scott said. “Sorry about that. I hope we can still get together later tonight for a drink.”

  Summer turned and walked off.

  “Huh.” Scott looked up at Maxine and practically leered. “So are you busy later on?”

  “I’ll make sure I am,” Maxine said as she turned to follow her friend who had stopped at another table. This one had a woman dentist in her early forties sitting at it.

  The dentist smiled at Maxine as she approached. “Hello, young lady,” she said.

  “Hello.” Maxine smiled back. “Oh, I have to say; it’s a real pleasure.”

  “Really?” The woman laughed. “And we’ve just met, too!”

  “Sorry.” Maxine jerked a thumb over her shoulder. “After Scott God’s Gift to the World Anderson over there, the bar is pretty low.”

  The woman smiled. “Yes, Scott can be quite a handful.” She waggled at finger at him. “He’s a real dickens, that one.”

  “Well, you’re half right,” Maxine said. She put out her hand, “Maxine.”

  “Stephanie,” the woman said. “Stephanie Dixon. Glad to meet you.”

  Summer leaned in. “So how do you think the competition is shaping up, Doc?”

  Stephanie shrugged. “Same as always; everyone’ll do their quickest extraction, toss in a stitch or two if they need to, then the audience votes on who the winner is.”

  “Okay, Doctor Dixon; I have to ask- how does one win at a tooth extraction competition?” Summer asked into her digital recorder. She held it out for Stephanie.

  “Well,” Stephanie considered the question for a moment. “There’s patient comfort, bedside manner, expertise, timeliness, bleeding, and of course, style.”

  “Wait, you said the audience decides the winner?” Maxine said.

  Stephanie nodded. “Oh yes; we can’t just ask the patients since some of them are brought by the dentist, and sometimes they don’t even speak English.”

  “Audience?” Summer said. “I never considered tooth extraction a spectator sport. At least it’s other dentists doing the judging, I suppose.”

  “Oh, they’re not all dentists. Most of them aren’t, in fact,” Stephanie said.

  “Dentist roadies?” Summer shook her head. “Now I’ve heard it all.”

  “Fans are fans.” Stephanie shrugged.

  “I’d like a photo, if I could,” Maxine said.

  Stephanie leaned back in her chair and tucked her hair behind her ears. “Fire away; this is as good as it gets.”

  “You look great,” Maxine said as she took several photos of her. “And I’ll get a couple during the competition as well if that’s okay.”

  “Whatever you need,” Stephanie said with a smile.

  “Good luck,” Summer said, “Break a leg even?”

  Stephanie laughed. “That works.” She looked at the clock. “You two better get to your seats; the competition is starting soon.”

  “Okay then.” Maxine said. “Thanks again.”

  With a wave, Summer and Maxine left. A different security guard was at the door to let them out. The two stopped as they exited. Almost a hundred people were now seated in the audience.

  “That’s just too weird.” Summer said. “But I guess we can stay and watch, then head downstairs.”

  “Right? I’m dying to hear the about the great whitening upsell.”

  “Where’s a Taco Tico when you need one?” Summer said with a headshake. She pointed. “Look, there’s a bunch of seats in the front row; lucky us.” They headed toward the seats.

  “Maybe that’s the ‘splash zone’?”

  “Eddie needs to send us to Hawaii or Vegas after this gig.”

  Maxine laughed as she turned and sat. She looked around. There was in fact, not a single person in the first row and hardly anyone in the second. “Weird.” She took several photos of the empty seats.

  FOUR

  Quincy stepped up onto the stage. “Hey, hey!” He shouted as he ran to the middle of the stage. “How is everyone doing?”

  Cheers from the crowd greeted him as he raised his hands over his head and practically jogged back and forth across the stage like a rock star at the beginning of a show.

  Maxine held her camera over her head and took a picture of the cheering people behind her. “You want to write a caption for that?”

  “I’d rather not,” Summer admitted.

  Quincy jogged back to the middle of the stage. He pointed at Summer and Maxine and gave a wink, then went back to addressing the crowd.

  “He’s living the dream,” Summer said as she waved to him.

  “Welcome to the fifth annual ex--trac--tion com--pe--tition!” Quincy bellowed into his microphone. He stretched out ‘extraction competition’ to almost ten seconds as if it were the winning goal in the World Cup.

  Maxine caught herself clapping as well.

  “And we’ve got a great show in store for you today. We have nine dentists ready to show you they have what it takes to be named best puller!”

  “Nine? It was ten when we were back there,” Summer said. “I wonder who dropped out.”
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  “So without further ado, let’s get ready to pullll!” Quincy turned around and raised his hands over his head as he drew out the word ‘pull’.

  The curtain pulled back revealing the now-nine chairs. Even though the last chair had been removed, the others had not been rearranged, so there was more of a gap on the right side of the stage than the left.

  Nine massive screens flickered to life above each chair.

  “Oh no,” Summer said as she craned her neck up to look at it.

  Each of the screens went from black to a view of the back room where the dentists were seated. The images jumped and panned around then as the dentists filed onto the stage, showed the cheering crowd. Several dentists panned across the audience creating min-waves as they did.

  Maxine craned her neck to look up at the screens as well. “That’s why no one’s in the front rows.” She nudged her partner. “Want to move back?”

  “Yeah; back to Tampa.”

  “Are you kidding?” Maxine laughed. “This is where the action is.” She looked over her shoulder. “There are a couple of seats two rows back. Let’s go.” Without waiting for Summer, she stood, folded her metal chair, laid it across the empty one beside her and stepped back a row. She repeated the action and then sat in the third row. “Come on!”

  Summer exhaled loudly as she too stood. Thanks to her friend, there was a clear path to the third row. “Do we have to?”

  Maxine raised her hands over her head. “Woooo!” She cheered along with everyone else.

  With a headshake, Summer joined her friend. She did not cheer, however.

  “Alright, alright,” Quincy said, quieting the crowd. “We’ve got a lot of great events going on this weekend so let’s get started.”

  “So who’s missing?” Summer asked.

  Maxine surveyed the group. “It’s that first guy...” Maxine hesitated. “Brian? That dentist you talked to that was from Idaho or Iowa or something.”

  “No, that was Bill that patient from Des Moines.” Summer said. “The doctor was from Nevada, I think he said.”

  “I need a chart.” Maxine said. “Or maybe...”

  “Everyone ready?” Quincy said as he raised his hands again.